Although most of us wouldn’t admit it, every worship leader has been super-frustrated with their pastor at some point. You know…those times when your pastor doesn’t see eye-to-eye with you.

Unfortunately, we are bound to disagree at some point – that’s just the beauty of being human. So, what’s the best way to settle a disagreement?

Yep…I get frustrated with my pastor too.

Currently, my pastor is also my dad. As you can imagine, this adds even more dynamic to the situation. Not to mention the fact that we are both classified as having choleric personalities, which basically means that we are ‘my way is best’ and ‘I will just do it myself’ type of people.

Due to our personality similarities, we often clash.

The most frustrating time for me is when he gives me specifics on what I should do, when it comes to processes and procedures. Like I said earlier, this comes out of his personality of ‘my way is best’, which I can closely relate to.

For example, we are planning to add a second service to our Sunday schedule, and he wanted me to have a separate worship team for each service. His motive behind this was to keep me from getting burned out.

However, in my eyes, this means double the rehearsal and planning time, because I now have to have two separate rehearsals for each team and plan a different set for each one as well. So, more time involved actually equals quicker burn-out.

You have never experienced true submission until you do something you don’t want to, without an attitude. Tweet Quote

How did we solve this? Well, it comes down to this – God has called us to respect our leaders. Even if you think you have a better idea, it is good for you to learn to submit anyways.

Actually, you have never experienced true submission until you do something you don’t want to, without an attitude.

After expressing my view, he still wanted to carry out his idea. So, after getting over myself, I figured out that it really wasn’t that big of a deal.

If it doesn’t work, then we will just change it – and if it does work, I will have been introduced to something beyond my own level of thinking. Either way, what is the big deal in trying something? Yeah, there isn’t one.

Be a good communicator, but not a top-class arguer.

Moral of the story? You should always be a good communicator with your leader, but not a top-class arguer. Express your view, but if they still want to go about it their way, then it is to your best interest to submit.

I spent years of my life intimidated by my dad, and therefore, I wouldn’t confront issues. I am now learning to pursue the conversations that are worth having, and letting go the small issues that don’t even matter. Take your frustrations to God in prayer, and He will show you exactly what you need to do.

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About the Author

Kade Young

Kade Young brought Collaborate Worship into existence with a dream of helping worship leaders around the world fulfill their calling with excellence. He has been leading worship since 2005, is a graduate of Rhema Bible Training College, and currently the worship leader at NoLimits Church in Owasso, Oklahoma.